1. You forget your name.
2. You start to think the smell of spit-up is kind of comforting.
3. You not only talk to the baby, you ask him for wardrobe advice.
4. Your most exciting revelation of the week: The ABC song and Twinkle Twinkle are exactly the same.
5. You refer to your husband as “Daddy.” Even in bed. And not in a sexy way.
6. You water the dog and feed the plant.
7. You have actual conversations with friends about the baby’s toots.
8. You catch yourself wondering if maybe those leftover strained peas would be good in an omelet.
9. Your idea of a fun time? Using shampoo and conditioner.
10. You forget the baby’s name.